Relapse in an addiction: the loop that's hard to break and how to ask for help

Addictions often keep us trapped in a loop that's hard to get out of, one where it becomes difficult to find pleasure in other, healthier activities. And a relapse hurts especially, because it arrives loaded with guilt. Here I explain why that loop happens and why asking for help isn't a failure, but the way forward.

Why it's so hard to get out of the loop

An addiction is a struggle that's hard to recognise, hard to put into words, and hard to manage. Using soothes something in the short term, but it leaves less room to enjoy other things, and that's how the cycle keeps feeding itself. It isn't a lack of willpower: it's a learned mechanism your body keeps repeating.

A relapse doesn't erase your progress

For many people, relapse is part of the process. It doesn't mean going back to square one, and it doesn't mean you're "no good": it's information about which situation, emotion, or thought triggers the urge to use. Being hard on yourself only feeds the guilt, and guilt tends to push you back toward using again.

What helps break the cycle

• ✓ Talk about your struggles with people who make you feel safe.
• ✓ Ask for help: doing it on your own is much harder.
• ✓ Explore the root of that tendency toward uncontrolled use.
• ✓ Identify your triggers so you can stay one step ahead of them.

How therapy can help

In individual therapy we work on both sides at once: managing the use itself and what lies underneath it. When there are painful experiences or trauma beneath the addiction, EMDR therapy helps ease their weight, so that using stops being the only way to find relief. I'm here to walk alongside you, without judgement.